Testo La vie boheme Rent

La vie boheme

MANAGER
No, please no
Not tonight, please no
Mister, can't you go
Not tonight, can't have a scene

ROGER
What?

MANAGER
Go, please go, you, hello sir!
I said no, important customer

MARK
What am I, just a blur?

MANAGER
You sit all night
You never buy

MARK
That's a lie
That's a lie
I had a tea the other day

MANAGER
You couldn't pay!

MARK
Oh, yeah

COLLINS
Benjamin Coffin III, here?

MANAGER
Oh, no

ALL
Wine and beer!

MAUREEN
The enemy of Avenue A
We'll stay

MANAGER
Oy vey

COLLINS
What brings the mogul in his own mind
To the Life Cafe?

BENNY
I would like to propose a toast
To Maureen's noble try

It went well

MAUREEN
Go to hell

BENNY
Was the yuppie scum stomped?
Not counting the homeless
How many tickets weren't comped?

ROGER
Why did Muffy-

BENNY
Alison

ROGER
-Miss the show?

BENNY
There was a death in the family
If you must know

ANGEL
Who died?

BENNY
Our akita

MARK, ROGER, ANGEL, COLLINS
Evita

BENNY
Mimi, I'm surprised
A bright and charming girl like you
Hangs out with these slackers
Who don't adhere to deals

You make fun, yet I am the one
Attempting to do some good
Or do you really want a neighborhood
Where people piss on your stoop every night?

Bohemia, Bohemia's
A fallacy in your head
This is Calcutta
Bohemia is dead

MARK
Dearly beloved, we gather here to say
Our goodbyes

COLLINS & ROGER
Dies Ira, Dies Illa
Kyrie Eleison
Yitgadal V' Yitkadash (etc.)

MARK
Here she lies,
No one knew her worth
The late great daughter of Mother Earth
On these nights when we celebrate the birth
In that little town of Bethlehem
We raise our glass
You bet your ass to...
La Vie Boheme

ALL
La Vie Boheme
La Vie Boheme
La Vie Boheme
La Vie Boheme

MARK
To days of inspiration,
Playing hookey, making something
Out of nothing, the need
To express to communicate,
To going against the grain,
Going insane,
Going mad

To loving tension, no pension
To more than one dimension,
To starving for attention,
Hating convention, hating pretension,
Not to mention of course,
Hating dear old mom and dad

To riding your bike
Midday past the three piece suits
To fruits, to no absolutes
To Absolut, to choice
To the Village Voice
To any passing fad

To being an us for once,
Instead of a them

ALL
La Vie Boheme
La Vie Boheme
La Vie Boheme

MAUREEN
Is the equipment in a pyramid?

JOANNE
It is, Maureen

MAUREEN
The mixer doesn't have a case
Don't give me that face!

MR. GREY
Ahemm

MAUREEN
Hey Mister... She's my sister

WAITER
So that's five miso soup,
Four seaweed salad
Three soy burger dinner,
Two tofu dog platter
And one pasta with meatless balls

BOHEMIAN
Eww

COLLINS
It tastes the same

MIMI
If you close your eyes

WAITER
And thirteen orders of fries
Is that it here?

ALL
Wine and beer!

MIMI & ANGEL
To hand-crafted beers made in local breweries
To yoga, to yogurt, to rice and beans and cheese
To leather, to dildos, to curry Vindaloo
To Huevos Rancheros, and Maya Angelou

MAUREEN & COLLINS
Emotion, devotion, to causing a commotion,
Creation, Vacation

MARK
Mucho masturbation

MAUREEN & COLLINS
Compassion, to fashion, to passion
When it's new

COLLINS
To Sontag

ANGEL
To Sondheim

FOUR PEOPLE
To anything taboo

COLLINS & ROGER
Ginsberg, Dylan, Cunningham and Cage

COLLINS
Lenny Bruce

ROGER
Langston Hughes

MAUREEN
To the stage!

PERSON #1
To Uta

PERSON #2
To Buddha

PERSON #3
Pablo Neruda, too

MARK & MIMI
Why Dorothy and Toto went over the rainbow
To blow off Auntie Em

ALL
La Vie Boheme

MAUREEN
And wipe the speakers off before you pack

JOANNE
Yes, Maureen

MAUREEN
Well, hurry back

MR. GREY
Sisters?

MAUREEN
We're close

ANGEL, COLLINS
Brothers!

MARK, ANGEL, MIMI & 3 OTHERS
Bisexuals, trisexuals, Homo Sapiens,
Carcinogens, hallucinogens, men,
Pee Wee Herman
German wine, turpentine, Gertrude Stein
Antonioni, Bertolucci, Kurosawa
Carmina Burana

ALL
To apathy, to entropy, to empathy, ecstasy
Vaclav Havel, The Sex Pistols, 8B
C
To no shame, never playing the fame game

COLLINS
To marijuana

ALL
To sodomy
It's between God and me
To S & M

BENNY
Waiter, Waiter, Waiter!!

ALL
La Vie Boheme

COLLINS
In honor of the death of Bohemia an impromptu salon will commence immediately following dinner...
Mimi Marquez, clad only in bubble wrap, will perform her famous lawnchair handcuff dance, to the sounds of iced tea being stirred.

ROGER
And Mark Cohen will preview his new documentary about his inability to hold an erection on high holy days.

MARK
And Maureen Johnson, back from her spectacular one night performance at the Eleventh Street Lot
Will perform Native American tribal chants, backwards through her vocoder, which she has never studied.

BENNY
Your new boyfriend doesn't know about us?

MIMI
There's nothing to know

BENNY
Don't you think that we should discuss-

MIMI
It was three months ago

BENNY
He doesn't act like he's with you

MIMI
We're taking it slow

BENNY
Where is he now?

MIMI
He's right-hmm
Where'd he go?

MARK
And Roger will attempt to write a bittersweet, evocative song

That doesn't remind us of 'Musetta's Waltz'

COLLINS
Angel Dumott Schunard will model her latest fall fashions from Paris while accompanying herself on the 10-gallon plastic pickle tub.

ANGEL
And Collins will recount his exploits as an Anarchist... Including the tale of
His successful reprogramming of the MIT virtual reality equipment to self-destruct as it broadcasts the words:

ALL
'Actual Reality - ACT UP - Fight AIDS! '

BENNY
Check!!

MIMI
Excuse me, did I do something wrong?
I get invited, then ignored all night long

ROGER
I've been trying, I'm not lying
No one's perfect, I've got baggage

MIMI
Life's too short babe, time is flying
I'm looking for baggage that goes with mine

ROGER
I should tell you-

MIMI
I've got baggage, too

ROGER
I should tell you--

BOTH
Baggage-

OTHERS
Wine And Beer!

MIMI
AZT break

ROGER
You?

MIMI
Me. You?

ROGER
Mimi