Testo Caved in Atmosphere

Caved in

The door opened
in walked my brother terrified
teary eyed I'm wide open
only to hear our father died
It's not true I'm hopin'
I need some air, I'm chokin'
Get me off this ride. Where's life goin'?
Feelin' I'm lost, I'm frozen.
Suspended in mid-traumatized state
Why I'm chosen for this fate
I don't know
Head shakes back and forth
emotion oh insociable not speakin
remain in silence 'cause I'm weak
and deep inside I'm freakin'
Want my father back I need him.
Why's god cheatin'
takin' half the two that gave me life
My mind replays the thought
now no longer can I sleep at night
not feelin' right
insecure
now what's my future lookin' like
aint' delt with death before
age eleven and can't take no more
My hands on the floor
'cause my stomach's feelin' sick
and I was mad at the lord
because he took him all to quick
that day
on his way to pick me up
he never made it
blamed it all on myself
and I dwelled in self-hatred
On a path called destruct
many thought I wouldn't make it
I hated the way I feel
but I just can't seem to shake it
somebody take it away
this mad situation
my world is breakin'
and I feel I'm 'bout to cave in
I tried to take it all in
after it all settled I couldn't begin
accepting you were gone
but understood
I tried to take it all in
after it all settled I couldn't begin
accepting you were gone
but understood
hey Dad I miss you
for everyday gone
and for the rest of my life
tried to remain strong
until we reunite
live on your memory
from the seeds
you planted gently
thanks for bein' there for me
and all the time you spent with me
love sent for me
if I could only have that day back
to sit down and rap
shoot the breeze and have a chat
but the fact still remains still later
on the day I have to meet our maker
I write my feelings on the paper
for now
along the golf course where you once played I see you
as I drive by I feel you
like your presence is there
I stop and I stare
I see the pictures of days we shared
well aware that you cared
making sure I was prepared for life
the hardships, the struggles,
the garbage, and the troubles that come with it
always kept my head with it
I gripped it
close to my heart
everything you tought me
my dad, my hero
you had my love for all eternity
I tried to take it all in
after it all settled I couldn't begin
accepting you were gone
but understood
I tried to take it all in
after it all settled I couldn't begin
accepting you were gone
but understood
I tried to take it all in
after it all settled I couldn't begin
accepting you were gone
but understood
I tried to take it all in
after it all settled I couldn't begin
accepting you were gone
but understood